Remember

There is nothing like a few pure tears mixing with droplets of sweat during warrior one.
Right knee lunged forward back left leg locked and powered with my left foot perpindicular to my mat.
I attended a 2hour restorative session at Betsy's Hot Yoga on Shelbyville rd today and I haven't stopped giggling since.   Every cell in my body is in agreement with my mind and heart.
We (all of these pieces of me) are leaving in less then two hours for the greyhound station.
Could I feel more loved and taken care of?
This is real, everything else is watching too many movies.
Be your own best friend.
Wisdom should be written

What if thought was the reality and the physical is an illusion
Satya (truth) Ghandi
"Honnesty is more comlicated than it first appears.
Practice absolute truthfulness for one week.
Truth lies at the very heart of existance of reality"

4 gates of speech

1. Is it true?
2. Is it kind?
3. Is it necessary?
4. Is this the right moment to say it?

"Kindness is the golden chain by which society is bound together" Goethe

My future depends on 6 billion human beings.  

We have to take care of each other and give compassion

This world is in our favor, 

Ask for whatever you want 

"A thing is right when it tends to preserve the integrity, stability, and beauty of the biotic community.  

It is wrong when it tends otherwise."  Aldo Leopold

"Its frightening, she thinks, how when the going gets rough you fall back on whatever awful thing you grew up with."  Barbara Kingsolver

"Freshen your world with vipassana bliss that surges from head to toes.  Remember this feeling.  You can feel this for the rest of your life.  Begin your journey, NOW."  SaraJean 2 years ago

"the chessboard is the world.  The pieces are the phenomena of the universe. The rules of the game are what we call the laws of nature.  The player on the other side is hidden from us.  We know that her play is always fair, just and patient.  But we also know that to our cost that she never overlooks a mistake or makes the smallest allowance for ignorance" Thomas Henry Huxley

Happy New Year!

Its already part of you, just keep looking

Today, I have only an ear to offer this world.
I truly wish I was backpacking in the smokey mountains right now.
I went for a run, walk, jog.
I stopped to visit some horses and climb a tree.
It is so warm outside I wore my Vibram 5 fingers.
The sun, wind, and sky were radiating with life.
 Even the soggy earth had a charming serenity about it.
It was perfect freedom from my thoughts.

When I got to my parents house, I checked the mail to find a surprise.
An organic seed magazine.
My eyes widen to the heirloom apple trees; cinnamon spice,  spitzenberg (Thomas Jefferson's fav), and a yellow and purple colored northern sky
Large varieties of Swiss chard, beats, rhubarb, Basil, okra, peas, peppers, onions, carrots, corn, garlic, asparagus, squash, pumpkins, celery, and eggplant seedlings.
Beans every color of the rainbow.  Some even speckled
Enchanting looking lettuce of purple, red, and green
with leaves as crisp as a fresh dollar bill
Tomatoes with names like; Amish Paste, German Queen, Red Calabash, Green Zebra, Maglia Rosa, and my favorite name Zapotec Pleated.
Germination stations, farm boxes, greenhouses, cultivating tools, deer fence, rain barrels, hoop houses, collapsible cold frames and fluorescent lights for sale.
Vegetables I have never heard of before like
Amaranth which is a bright red plant.  Can be used as a dye or salad mix
Kohlrabi which looks alot like a root wad but is crisp and white
Quinoa I have heard of this before but never thought to grow it
Herbs, flowers, and cover crops like barley, clover, and vetch are also for sale.
I want to grow nettle, yarrow, sage, chamomile, calendula, st. john's wort, and bergamot

This tugs on my inner farmgirls dreams and heartstrings.
I tell myself I will likely have 60 some years of life ahead of me.
Why do I want to settle into such a permanent lifestyle right now?
All around me I see peers, family, and friends, engaged, married, pregnant, raising children, starting careers.
Geeze louise I haven't experienced anything like that.
I would like to one day.
It seems like fun.
Yesterday I met with Tibetan Monks.
Now, I will sit with myself in silence.

Easy Silence lyrics by Dixie Chicks

When the calls and conversations
Accidents and accusations
Messages and misperceptions
Paralyze my mind
Busses, cars, and airplanes leaving
Burning fumes of gasoline
And everyone is running
And I come to find a refuge in the
Easy silence that you make for me
It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay
Monkeys on the barricades
Are warning us to back away
They form commissions trying to find
The next one they can crucify
And anger plays on every station
Answers only make more questions
I need something to believe in
Breathe in sanctuary in the
Easy silence that you make for me
It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay
Children lose their youth too soon
Watching war made us immune
And I've got all the world to lose
But I just want to hold on to the
Easy silence that you make for me
It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The easy silence that you make for me
It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay

LOVING KINDNESS

Right from the moment of birth

We are under the care

And kindness of our parents

And then later on in our life

When we are oppressed

by sickness

And become old

We are again dependent

on the kindness of others.

Since the begining

and end of our lives

We are so dependent on

others kindness

How can it be

that in the middle

We neglect kindness

towards others and ourselves?

As if you didn't already know
life as a modern american woman is very colorful

Why is it in the animal kingdom males traditionally indulge in this sort of behavior?
I just want equality.

friendship

A Precious Human Life
Every  day, think as you wake up
Today I am fortunate to have woken up,
I am alive, I have a precious human life,
I am not going to waste it.
I am going to use all my energies to develop myself,
To expand my heart out for others,
To achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings.
I am going to have kind thoughts towards others.
I am not going to get angry,
or think badly about others
I am going to benefit others as much as I can.
the 14th Dalai Lama

Corn Chowder 2010
feeds 5 people
2 cans or 2 1/2c organic yellow corn
Diced up ham or veggie substitute
1 thin sliced med organic yellow onion
1/4c chopped organic red onion
2 cloves organic garlic
1/2 can organic vegatable or chicken broth
1/2 c half and half or milk alternative
2 organic potatoes chopped
alderwood smoked sea salt
3/4 t ground pepper
red pepper flakes
peperika

cook potatoes till soft (but not too soft) in a small pot of water
Cook ham in a big cast iron skillet
Add onions and garlic
once everythings all warm transfer it to a big pot on med/high heat
add everything else and stir alot.
Let it sit on med/low heat for about 10-15 mins
Spice to taste

Just Be

So I know I should keep my feet right here underneath my shoulders and smile but I have to tell someone about my future plans.  
Saturday night 
I will board a Greyhound bus to Rockford, IL.  
People keep telling me it sounds like an unusual place to go.  
Really, my final destination will be the Illinois Vipassana Center, dhamma pakasa.  
I will serve for them until Jan 24th.  Throughout this time I will be unable to update this blog.  I will also be serving my little sister Loretta as she sits her first 10 day silent meditation course.   How exciting!  
After this I will be sitting and serving at other centers for the following 2 months.  
Here is a website with a list of meditation centers around the world
www.dhamma.org


April and May 
I hope to be a ridge runner on the Appalachian Trail.  
I will hike a specific section of the AT and encourage hikers and visitors to make safe responsible decisions.  
I will assist in emergency situations and report unsafe conditions. 
I will also maintain a daily log and maintain communication with field supervisors and agency partners
Here is the website if you are interested in volunteering
http://www.appalachiantrail.org/site/c.mqLTIYOwGlF/b.4850645/k.FA36/Volunteer.htm


June and July 
I will hopefully be leading backpacking trips in the Great Smoky Mountains Institute at Tremont
I will provide in-depth experiences through education programs that celebrate ecological and cultural diversity
I will develop and implement curriculum that includes backcountry living skills, Leave No Trace principles, leadership training, service-learning, natural and cultural history of the area
Dates of Employment: June 6-10 (precamp), June 13-18, June 27-July 2, and July 18-28, 2011


End of July-Oct?
As soon as I am finished with camp I will fly to Northern India 
I will begin yoga teacher training.
In the World Capital of Yoga - Rishikesh 
The course runs over 6 weeks. Aug 1-Sept 10th
One of the most comprehensive courses of teacher training
I will learn 
asanas,
breathing, 
meditation,
cleansing, 
anatomy & physiology, 
yoga philosophy, 
and teaching modules,
More information can be found here
http://www.healthandyoga.com/certification/India/Rishikesh/75/default.aspx

Rishikesh

 At the foothills of the Himalayas along the banks of the sacred river Ganges, lies the town of Rishikesh. The first town this holy river reaches on its decent from the mountains, Rishikesh is home to many ashrams, and most major Indian ashram, including Vivekenanda, Sivananda, Osho, Bihar school of yoga, have an office there. It is a good place to experience classical Indian yoga. Class instruction may leave a few gaps for students used to the precision of western classes, but with its slow and spiritual atmosphere, it's an enjoyable place to begin discovering what India has to offer. Rishikesh is less intense than other parts of India, probably because people have religion on their minds.  Most people are very friendly and quick to say hello or namaste. 
 As a pilgrimage point, Rishikesh greets many devout Hindus and wandering sadhus (holy men). Many come to bathe in the sanctified waters of the Ganges, as Hindus believe this can remove layers of karma. This peaceful ashram centre is certainly one of the more atmospheric places in India. As the sun rises from behind the mountains, and cuts through the fog, locals wash in the river. Live temple chanting sets the tone. Beginning around 4 am, the chants float across the water until well after dark. During night time pujas (ceremonies), offerings of hundreds of camphor flame leaf boats float picturesquely on the river. 

So this is all within the realm of possibility.
Why not.
My mom believes in me and said I can do it all.
I think so too.

"Suddenly I See"

Her face is a map of the world
Is a map of the world
You can see she's a beautiful girl
She's a beautiful girl
And everything around her is a silver pool of light
The people who surround her feel the benefit of it
It makes you calm
She holds you captivated in her palm

Suddenly I see (Suddenly I see)
This is what I wanna be
Suddenly I see (Suddenly I see)
Why the hell it means so much to me

I feel like walking the world
Like walking the world
You can hear she's a beautiful girl
She's a beautiful girl
She fills up every corner like she's born in black and white
Makes you feel warmer when you're trying to remember
What you heard
She likes to leave you hanging on her word

Suddenly I see (Suddenly I see)
This is what I wanna be
Suddenly I see (Suddenly I see)
Why the hell it means so much to me

And she's taller than most
And she's looking at me
I can see her eyes looking from a page in a magazine
Oh she makes me feel like I could be a tower
A big strong tower
She got the power to be
The power to give
The power to see

Suddenly I see (Suddenly I see)
This is what I wanna be
Suddenly I see (Suddenly I see)
Why the hell it means so much to me 

underneath

"Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies"
 mother thersa

I live with a slight fearlessness which can sting like nettle.
Conformity is an illusion of being saved from aloneness.
I have a choice to go bravely into tonight and tomorrow and see the beauty in still moments.
Like a photographer, I pause time.
Like a journalist, I examine each angle.
no judgement.
I am looking for.....
Something pious.

What happens when you finish your cup of tea in the morning and have no where to go?  No class, no work, no obligations.  Perhaps, boil more water and keep it coming.
attention, attention, attention
That is the only way anything happens in this life.
I observe my emotions like tiptoeing across a fresh frozen pond.
I am cautious.

Remember the story about the cloud and rain.
Every raindrop is screaming "I am the same peaceful cloud on a sunny day"
There is no end to these hands/fingers, pen/paper, tree/ink, water, minerals, soil, seed, waste.
This heartbeat is felt in a rhythmic wave across the page.
Through the space in this room.
Beyond walls, beyond time.
The connection is infinite.
Your eyes complete the.......... no, they are yet another ripple in this thought.
I do not need anything or anyone to provide happiness.
I feel like an actress sometimes putting on a grand and not so grand performance for free.

I feel sometimes I am surrounded by disease and death.
There will be a change to a new paradigm.
A transition to survive.
No oil.
No food.
No amount of technology or human ingenuity can change or turn over the laws of the universe and physics.
What to do.....
Learn how to live off the land.
Buy gold.
store seeds.
We will fail as rugged individuals.
We must live as members of community and family.

"Can I just share your pillow as we sit?"  I asked my friend in a dream.  He silently scooted over.  

I have been dreaming allot about the Appalachian trail.  

Reading dreaming thinking.  

It is silly b/c I know once i am there I will find myself missing this warm bed indoors.  

I love my life because I make stories.  

Because I do it all the time, I am very good at it.  

I love my eyes because I can see the world around me.  

"Wouldn't you like to live in Montana?"  someone asked me.  

Why yes, that sounds fantastic.  But my heart has pulled me east and tugs me to the somber hills in the south.  

balance

After work last night, I spent 3 hours in the chair getting my roots tattooed on my back.  The tree is growing. I am growing.  It is balanced.  I am balanced.  

The coming year will be a time to think big -- maybe even bigger than you've dared to think in over a decade. That doesn't mean you should be rash, reckless, or unrealistic. On the contrary. Your expansive dreams should be carefully wrought and anchored in a detailed understanding of how things actually work. As an example of what not to do, learn from Snoop Dogg. The rapper wanted to rent all 62 square miles of the small European nation of Liechtenstein so he could film his music video there. Liechtenstein authorities turned him down, but only because his team didn't ask far enough in advance. Had he been better organized, the whole country could have been his.

 "The collective is tremendously impacted by what's going on now. This is a huge turning point for the world at large -- not just in terms of world events, but [in terms of] consciousness."

This was the first total lunar eclipse to fall on a winter solstice in 372 years. The last time a lunar eclipse corresponded with a winter solstice, or the annual day when the Earth's axis is tilted farthest from the sun, was Dec. 21, 1638. Astrologers and others who believe in the power of astronomical activity believe solar and lunar eclipses are always significant moments, but those that coincide with solstices make for even more intensified terrestrial events.

http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/lunar-eclipse-winter-solstice-making-meaning-cosmic-coincidence/story?id=12451607

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GnmAMN4858